This week James returns to talk Weird Al songs that should have been, salad bars, Sumo Burger, and the Rebel Bass. Also: James NerdBurgers Mike on the Peloponnesian War and the history of the Jewish people from Rome to the present. Part one of three!

Check out the Sumo Burger, and all the burgers, at Oishii Burger.

And get yourself a Rebel Bass here. Get it? Instead of “Rebel Base”? Happy Star Wars Day! Or Cinco de Quatro… Oh hey, it’s Cinco de Mayo!

And because we mentioned Frank Black and borrowed our title from his song:

This week’s alternate episode titles were:

Losing My Transmission
Those People Can’t Have Freedom
Rome Can Eat a Dick
The Spartans, The Jews, and The Candlestick Maker
The Richard Dreyfuss Affair
Ron Swanson’s Burger
Why Everyone Wants a Big Phone